How many guys do you know who are really, truly happy with their jobs. Use this measurement. Would they still do their job if they made 25% less? How about 50% less? I may know 3 guys like this.
Fact is, most of us do what we do because we can turn a pretty good buck. And, if we do it well for long enough we can get the hell out at a relatively young age and do something we really like.
The bad things about work; crazy fucking people in the office, commuting, endless meetings, painful powerpoints, lame boss, poor leadership, shitty pay, paperwork, listening to people's idiotic stories, answering to some schlep who is superior due only to survival.
Good things; pay, expense account.
Obviously we have to work to pay for all of the shit in our lives but don't tell me "love what you do." Tell me, "love how much you'll get paid doing it."
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Cleavage
God, what a subject. The shit is great.
Cleavage is one of those things that you can just never get enough of. When you think about it, there are only a few things in life that no matter how much you have you could always use some more.
Like pizza and sex, even bad cleavage is still pretty good. The shit is everywhere too. Obviously chicks with big racks have nice cleavage. But even chicks with little bombs can produce some excellent action.
I have been impressed with the kind of cleavage you could fall into as well as the kind that could barely hide a pea. Doesn't matter. I'll even check out cleavage on huge women with outrageous cans (and so will you).
When does cleavage stop being cleavage? I think when nipples appear. At that point the curiousity is over and you just see the cans - which are great no matter what.
Cleavage is one of those things that you can just never get enough of. When you think about it, there are only a few things in life that no matter how much you have you could always use some more.
Like pizza and sex, even bad cleavage is still pretty good. The shit is everywhere too. Obviously chicks with big racks have nice cleavage. But even chicks with little bombs can produce some excellent action.
I have been impressed with the kind of cleavage you could fall into as well as the kind that could barely hide a pea. Doesn't matter. I'll even check out cleavage on huge women with outrageous cans (and so will you).
When does cleavage stop being cleavage? I think when nipples appear. At that point the curiousity is over and you just see the cans - which are great no matter what.
Fries
I like to eat really good french fries. In fact, I will travel for exceptional fries. The best I've had are on the Ocean City, MD boardwalk.
However, I recently discovered a burger place called Five Guys. They have maybe the best fries you can find. They are fresh cut and fried perfectly (crispy out and soft in). You also get a pile of them with your order. They are the real deal!
Last week I brought a friend there to introduce him. We had lunch and powered down a few orders of fries with our burgers. As we wound down our meal he looked at me and said, "these fries are just not that good." I was appalled. What the fuck is that?
However, I recently discovered a burger place called Five Guys. They have maybe the best fries you can find. They are fresh cut and fried perfectly (crispy out and soft in). You also get a pile of them with your order. They are the real deal!
Last week I brought a friend there to introduce him. We had lunch and powered down a few orders of fries with our burgers. As we wound down our meal he looked at me and said, "these fries are just not that good." I was appalled. What the fuck is that?
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Meatheads
Meatheads are guys who realized at some point in time that their most attractive trait was that they were physically strong or excelled at one particular sport. In high school these traits will probably put you in the more popular crowd.
However, as they get older they cling to those traits and fail to develop other skills that help them blend well with their more mature surroundings. In college they probably play a sport but not well enough to make a career of it and that frustration forces them to do idiotic things. The list of these is endless but probably begins with throwing a sofa or chair out a dorm window. It may even include things like breaking elevators or stealing large objects from public places. In college that is borderline acceptable.
In the adult world these guys really stick out. They will never totally excel in business as they probably didn't spend enough time studying in college and their competitive nature makes them confrontational. A difficult mix if you don't always know the answer. I'm sure you know a guy at the office who thinks he's bright and widely liked (because he was in his formative years) but really is neither.
This guy is not a bad guy and can often be fun at parties. However, he is a meathead or simply, a "meat."
However, as they get older they cling to those traits and fail to develop other skills that help them blend well with their more mature surroundings. In college they probably play a sport but not well enough to make a career of it and that frustration forces them to do idiotic things. The list of these is endless but probably begins with throwing a sofa or chair out a dorm window. It may even include things like breaking elevators or stealing large objects from public places. In college that is borderline acceptable.
In the adult world these guys really stick out. They will never totally excel in business as they probably didn't spend enough time studying in college and their competitive nature makes them confrontational. A difficult mix if you don't always know the answer. I'm sure you know a guy at the office who thinks he's bright and widely liked (because he was in his formative years) but really is neither.
This guy is not a bad guy and can often be fun at parties. However, he is a meathead or simply, a "meat."
Urinal Etiquette
Don't look here, the joke is in your hands! Maybe the all time best men's room grafitti.
Got me thinking, where else do you look when in a rest room with multiple urinals? The only acceptable place is straight ahead. Not a little to the left or a little to the right and certainly not directly to either side. Look down and you probably observe splattering onto your clothes - something that is hard to prevent so I'd rather not see.
I was once at a fraternity house where the bathroom contained 7 or 8 toilets on the wall, right next to each other with no partitions. I remember standing at the toilet urinating while a woman was doing the exact same thing but sitting (as women do), right next to me. This put her at an unfortunate vantage point watching me empty my bladder.
Anyway, it is a strange dynamic standing against a wall of urinals as others come and go, pissing into their respective tubs and trying to ignore each other.
Then, what happens when you're in a public place like a bar or restaurant and an old friend comes into the restroom and you recognize each other? Do you shake hands?
Got me thinking, where else do you look when in a rest room with multiple urinals? The only acceptable place is straight ahead. Not a little to the left or a little to the right and certainly not directly to either side. Look down and you probably observe splattering onto your clothes - something that is hard to prevent so I'd rather not see.
I was once at a fraternity house where the bathroom contained 7 or 8 toilets on the wall, right next to each other with no partitions. I remember standing at the toilet urinating while a woman was doing the exact same thing but sitting (as women do), right next to me. This put her at an unfortunate vantage point watching me empty my bladder.
Anyway, it is a strange dynamic standing against a wall of urinals as others come and go, pissing into their respective tubs and trying to ignore each other.
Then, what happens when you're in a public place like a bar or restaurant and an old friend comes into the restroom and you recognize each other? Do you shake hands?
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Are you a tool?
Answer 'yes' to any of these questions to figure out if you are a tool.
-Do you tell your buddies that you got a promotion at work?
-Do you really think your under-8-year-old is going to be a professional athlete?
-Do you watch Monday Night Football wearing an authentic jersey?
-Do you go out at night expecting to get into a fight?
-Have you told anyone your interest rate on your mortgage?
-Do you tell your buddies that you got a promotion at work?
-Do you really think your under-8-year-old is going to be a professional athlete?
-Do you watch Monday Night Football wearing an authentic jersey?
-Do you go out at night expecting to get into a fight?
-Have you told anyone your interest rate on your mortgage?
What Men Talk About
Every week or two I go out with a couple buddies and drink some beer. We usually do this around some televised sporting event, not because we want to watch the game. Rather, the game is a backdrop, something to look at while you or one of your pals is talking. You can either listen to your friends or the television or ignore both and assess the cocktail waitresses.
The next morning, my wife used to ask what we talked about all night. She'd ask, "How is their new baby?", "Are they going to renovate their home?", "Where are they going on vacation?", etc. I could never answer any of these questions because I never asked them and "they" never mentioned anything about any of those topics. She is always staggered that three guys would spend four hours together and talk about nothing.
Its not that we talk about nothing. Its that we talk about nothing that interests her, or any other woman.
The list of things we discuss is short; steak, women's anatomy and sports.
The next morning, my wife used to ask what we talked about all night. She'd ask, "How is their new baby?", "Are they going to renovate their home?", "Where are they going on vacation?", etc. I could never answer any of these questions because I never asked them and "they" never mentioned anything about any of those topics. She is always staggered that three guys would spend four hours together and talk about nothing.
Its not that we talk about nothing. Its that we talk about nothing that interests her, or any other woman.
The list of things we discuss is short; steak, women's anatomy and sports.
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